I Bought It Files: SHARK Bracelet & Faux Fur Leopard Print Coat!

I realized yesterday that AN ENTIRE DAY HAD PASSED without me engaging in ANY sort of online shopping experience. So today I vowed to right that terrible wrong.

I had an online gift certificate to Fred Flare, which is one of my favorite stores of all time (run by some of the nicest PEOPLE of all time -- Chris, Keith and Jen are LITTLE MIRACLES), which is why I'll soon be the proud owner of a new leopard-print faux fur coat AND a Disney Couture shark bracelet. TWO NECESSITIES, of course.

($78, FredFlare.com)

I've been on a mission for MONTHS now to find a great faux fur coat, and I hope this one delivers. It's no Wren fur coat, but it's also not $795, now is it?

($54, Disney Couture, FredFlare.com)

I'm not necessarily a Disney person, nor am I usually into licensed merch (often it skeeves me out), but I do positively LOVE Disney Couture's jewelry, particularly because it doesn't look like kid Disney stuff. And it's made really well. My Disney treasure chest ring, also from Fred Flare, looks brand-new after years of wear. Oh yeah, and Disney Couture's Tron merch is out of this world. (Get it?) Anyway, I ended up buying this shark bracelet. Because I really really needed a shark bracelet, as it turns out.

Oh yeah, get 30% off with code word "Flare." YAY! Love a sale!

4 SUPER Cute Tops For Under $100

When staring down into the deep, dark unknown that is my crappy Ikea wardrobe that houses the bulk of my closet (you say "walk-in," I say "hastily constructed particle board rectangle with doors!"), I've started to realize that what I'm really lacking is cute, easy-to-wear tops. Being, um, let's say generously curvy in "places," I try to avoid tight tops because they can look hooch-o-rama and kind of tacky. I aim to be neither of those things. So I like a slightly tailored yet comfortably slouchy top. Even better if it's got a banded waist so I don't look like I'm wearing a paper or plastic bag.

Anyway, here are four adorable tops -- I'm big into lace insets, apparently -- that look perfect with jeans and are still casual, don't get me wrong, but they're a half step up from the t-shirt-and-jeans look. And they're all under $100, so that's even more adorable, you know?

4 Adorable Tops I'd Buy In Second Because They're Under $100 

+ Ella Moss "Kaleidoscope" Lace Inset Sweatshirt, $98, Bloomingdales.com
+ Ella Moss "Chastity" Lace Draped Neck Top, $61.42, Bloomingdales.com
+ Dustie Doll Acid Wash Lace Cutout Sweatshirt, $65, Stantonjames.com
+ BB Dakota cropped Lake Superior Top, $48, Fredflare.com

Stress Shopping = Maripol x Marc Jacobs Madonna Makeover

Sooo, yesterday I was under the gun at work, so I stress shopped, which is what happens when pressure and adroitness lead to a brief power shopping binge. So I finally pulled the trigger and got that Marc Jacobs Maripol plastic spiked necklace I'd been considering:

($41, eBay)

Maripol, a French artist, was Madonna's stylist during her "Like A Virgin" days. Or, as I like to refer to them, her salad days. Not to be confused with her Botox days.

Check out more Maripol x Marc Jacobs at the Marc Jacobs site. Annoyingly, most of it's only available in the store, which I tend to NEVER visit due to potential lack of impulse control. But it's all super affordable.

And check out this old-school video of Maripol interviewing Madonna.

Oh yeah, and I also stress shopped this adorable white lace top from Fred Flare

($34, BB Dakota, Fred Flare)

If I were a gambling woman, I'd put my money on "immediately" when wagering a bet as to how soon it'll be before I spill coffee on this.

And now, please to watch Madonna perform one of my all-time favorite songs: "Into The Groove." (This came on at my wedding while I was talking to some "grown-up" and I wanted to push them over to get onto the dance floor. Truth.)

Sweetest Lil Bow Earrings!

Randomly, I found these suuuuuper teensy weensy widdle 14-karat gold bow earrings. Adorable as a baby miniature dachshund.

($19.99, Gemologica.com)

And that price? $20? Can't beat it with a stick!

($9, FredFlare.com)

... Or check out Fred Flare's pair of black enamel bows for just $9.

Ashish LUST + Sequined Boyfriend Blazers For A SONG

WHY aren't I wearing this one-shoulder NEON animal print Ashish dress RIGHT THIS MINUTE AS I BLOG THIS... instead of this 532-year-old polyester/rayon robe someone brought my mom back from China. That's not a racialist comment. It's just from China and it's made of really uncomfortable polyblend.

($895, Ashish, Net-a-porter.com)

Oh yeah. I guess I'm not wearing it because it's $895.

OhBTW, speaking of Ashish, I LOVE this Ashish black sequined boyfriend blazer (best friend blazer!), but it's $1020, and HI! The one I got at Fred Flare is $84. So I just saved you $936 (not including tax.) You're WELCOME.

L: $84, Fred Flare; R: $1020, Ashish

Jog Into December In Some Snowjoggers

Winter is the most huzzah-worthy time of the year, IMO. I LOVE cold weather, I LOVE bundling up, and I LOVE anything that reminds me of growing up in the snowy arctic freeze that was winter in Cleveland, Ohio. Like, why don't they make Freaky Freezies in adult sizes, hm?

Anyway, I LURVE Snowjoggers winter boots because they're basically where a kid can be a kid... or whatever. Except they're for gwon-ups, but they come in bright, fun colors, and they're like moonboots but not as ridiculous.

I have a pair of the Sno-Coney blue, yellow, and red ones, which are like straight out of a Rainbow Brite Christmas special...

But I LOVE the new buffalo plaid ones from Fred Flare:

($88, Snowjoggers, Fred Flare)

... Or, check 'em in green and black from Karmaloop:

($80, Snowjoggers, Karmaloop)

+ Check out more Snowjoggers here.

Sweater I Need RIGHT This Second! Animal Bandido At Fred Flare!

It should be much more than obvious why I NEED this rainbow bright reversible magic pyramid sweater. It's $95, but really $47.5 per side when you think about it! It's by Barcelona brand Animal Bandido, and it's available at Fred Flare, where you can also read a lil moar about the brand.

It's like a cotdamn Tom Tom Club video come to LYF!


Also, I went to check out the opening of Fred Flare store in Greenpoint, and it was like retail Disney -- the happiest place on earth! And speaking of Disney, I picked up this Disney treasure chest ring for $44 -- I'd wanted it for forever:

($44, Disney Couture, Fred Flare)

I love it so much I slept in it...


... And I got these denture ice cube trays!

($10, Fred Flare)

So necessary! So best!

Oh yeah, Fred Flare ALSO carries JONATHAN ADLER products! LOVE! Come holidaze, I'll be goin' crazy bonkers coconuts bananas shopping there. Especially shopping for MEEEEEEE!!!! WEEE!

My Fantastic Brunch With Fred Flare! And Jonathan Adler! And Parker Posey! (But Not Charlie.)

Guys! Yesterday I got to go the most wonderful brunch situation. It was a charity brunch hosted by Fred Flare, the proceeds went to God's Love With Deliver (which is a wonderful New York City-based organization that delivers healthy meals to people living with HIV/AIDS), and the guest of honor was JONATHAN ADLER! THE Jonathan Adler! And radworthy woman Parker Posey was there too. The brunch was across the street from the Fred Flare store at tasty Greenpoint yum/ coffee/ vinyl outpost, Eat, and their coffee almost had me ZOOMING down the street it was so strong and good and delicious. Anyway, it was also the year anniversary of Fred Flare's brick-and-mortar store opening (I did a piece about the store at this time last year, and I had the pleasure and honor of meeting Chris, Keith, and Jen at that time).

Anyway, Parker Posey herself toasted the guys and said it best -- it was so great to see everyone smiling and happy. And that smiling, happy vibe at the brunch is same fun and infectious vibe that Keith and Chris and their Flare girls (and guys!) bring to the store.

Fred Flare is one of my favorite stores on EARTH, and that's because Keith and Chris are two of the nicest, hardest-working, most fun and just geniunely good guys who deserve all of their success and more. Happy anniversary guys! And MEWS to Charlie!

Oh yeah, check out the insane black sequined blazer I picked up at the store. DEATH!

($84, FredFlare.com)

It was $84 bucks, but I felt like A MILLION TRILLION bucks in it, which is what Fred Flare's all about.

Oh yeah, PLEASE GTK (get to know) Fred Flare kitty CHARLIE, who, aside from Roris P. Cat, and Simonium Timonium, who's my other cat with Beauty Blogging Junkie's Glambr (long story), and the late, great, Romeo, AKA King Of All Kats, is the CUTEST CAT IN THE UNIVERSE. Then GTK their amazing night out on Fashion's Night Out, where they went on a designer scavenger hunt! Amazements!

Warm Up! Grey-Day Accessories! Plus: Fred Flare's New Store!

The weather went from pleasant to fucking February in like a week. Here are some warmy woolies and stuff in lovely neutral greys to stay warm in, kay?

($14, Lulu's)

Berets aren't usually my thing, but this one does a nice job of straddling that dangerous line between "oui oui hee hee!" and hackeysacking.

($20, Fred Flare)

The sweet pom pom makes me wanna do snow angels, and the wooden button keeps this grey-day hat from a.) flying off yo damn head and b.) being too cutesy-cute. ALSO, you can save save save on shipping with promo code "STORE CUTE." Why? Because FRED FLARE is opening their first-ever brick-and-mortar! FINALLY! Also, I wrote a lil story about it for Metromix New York! Read, believe, ACHIEVE! It's an interview with Chris and Keith (the brains behind Fred Flare), and two sweeter souls don't exist in this world, with the exception of my boyfriend and my cat. Wait... not my cat. He's a total jerkface. Anyway, you MUST go check out the store in Greenpoint and go spend your bucks on Jonas Brothers wayfarers and bags like this... oooh or this We Are the Superlative Conspiracy bag... or this bustier dress in black or red...

($22.50, Alloy)

Yeah, so I really love this grey scarf too.

($21.50, Victorianbird, Etsy)

Stripy fleecy sweatshirty scarf! Sing huzzah!

($9.99, Target)

I like how these heart gloves are like stop-light inspired. JUST THINK of how much funner driving would be if the lights were HEARTS instead of just circular-lights. Of course, then we'd probably just get sick of them and never notice. Ahhhh ennui.

($12, Lulu's)

Perfect winter socks for boots or bummin' around the house. I like to put on some super warmo socks WITH my slippers, for extra-warm crumb bum effect!

OH YEAH: coming soon -- a big-ass scarf post by a special guest poster!! Until then, control your parameters. 'Kay nighty nite!

Laptop Bags That Aren't Super Nerdy

Just because YOU'RE a computer nerd (yay!) doesn't mean you have to carry a totally nerded-out laptop bag. I'm currently in the market for a good one, because the Targus ones just ain't cutting it.

Soooo today in Andie Woo on Smith Street, I saw a bag that only reiterated my extreme need for an extremely cute laptop bag. Observes:

($150, Mixx, Alternative Outfitters)

Soooooo cute, right? I'd carry this "Danielle" bag around as a regular bag too. By the way, I guess the brand was called Mixx but now it's called Hoyden Life, but my inquiries to both have bounced back. Weird. But, most importantly, you can still buy their stuff. Yay.

($122, Mixx, Lulamae.com)

The "Megan" bag. Adorable.

($265, Mat & Nat)

Vegan bag line Mat & Nat has totally swankified their sitch. This bag is actually from their men's line, but we'll just let that be our little secret.

($34, Fred Flare)

Not officially a laptop bag, but if you've got a real light and lovely one, like, say, a Macbook Air, you could carry it in this cuteness. My Acer -- which I refer to as the Acer of Base -- however, weighs about as much as a refrigerator, so a lightweight bag such as this might cause me a bit of scapular distress if I tried to carry my compootah in it.

Anyway, point is, those Mixx/ Hoyden Life bags are where it be.

Soundgirl Sample Sale, Y'awl!

My very beloved Soundgirl is having an in-house (sorry non-NYC-ers) sample sale through Thursday, August 23. I hit it up, and here's what I got:

($62, Soundgirl, Fred Flare)
They had this there for $30, I think.


($68, Soundgirl, Lilygraceonline.com)
I got this but with a purple background. It's a weeee bit snug, but oh wells. It was about $30 also, I think.


($62, Soundgirl, Amazon)
I got this for about $15, but it was missing the sash (boo). I'm gonna cut off the shoulder ruffles. Also, Fred Flare has it on sale for $24.



($46, Soundgirl, Vendima)
This was $30, I think.


Other stuff I admired but did not buy:
($64, Soundgirl, Vendima)
Super cute "Bunny Hutch" dress in London Fog, from their Fall 2007 collection.


($63, Soundgirl, Zappos)
This one was there for about $20.


($64, Soundgirl, 80spurple.com)
They had this for about $20, but I couldn't find it in the right size, and I truly do not need another hoodie.


Anyway, get thee to Soundgirl! Here's the info:

Lovely People Shoes and Soundgirl Sample Sale!

Wednesday August 22nd and Thursday August 23rd
10am – 6pm

Shoes: $60
Boots: $75
Clothes from $5 – 150

1385 Broadway
5th floor
between 37 & 38th streets
For more information call 212.730.0377

Awful Vs. Awesome

UPDATE: Eff you, Blogger! Apparently the confucked tool ate some of the pix in this post. So I've reposted them. Thanks go out to ad hoc QA committee JnLRswk, who alerted me to the full-on morts and claims that Fashionbinge "is like a free Lucky Mag but funny." Awww!

And now, it's time for another edition of Awful Vs. Awesome (tm), the game where point out something awful and follow it up with something totally awesome.

First Awful:
($793, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Zappos Couture)
I've already started seeing these EVERYWHERE. They're so shitty. Like a paper bag cinched around the top of an otherwise perfectly acceptable boot. Marc, we already know you're a ground breaker. Please don't try to reinvent the wheel. Or the boot as the case may be.



AWESOME:
($495, Belle By Sigerson Morrison, Plazatoo.com)
Thank you, Belle, for this gorgeous, graceful, unmolested boot.


AWFUL:
($129, Vince Camuto, Nordstrom)
Waste of toe space.



AWESOME:
($197, Michael Kors, Nordstrom)
What would Prince do? Buy these. And that man's funk is always on point.



AWFUL:
($160, Michael Kors, Plazatoo.com)
Funky if you wear Lee Mom Jeans.



AWESOME:
($16, Forever 21)
Simple, silver, sold!


AWFUL:


($69, Jeffrey Campbell, Solestruck.com)
See what I mean about the Irregular Choice-esqueness of Jeffrey Campbell? These look like someone desecrated the Japanese flag. He giveth with one hand and taketh with the other.


AWESOME:
($49, Very Volatile, Lulusfashionlounge.com)
Cone head = bad. Cone heel = very good.

Also, enter promo code SEVENTEENROCKS for 20% off. Woo!



AWFUL:
($450, Isabella Fiore, eLuxury)
Nothing says "gauche" like teetering atop 4.5" inches of embroidered peacock and patent leather!


AWESOME:
($150, Salvador Sapena, Asos.com)
Perfect in every way.


AWFUL:
($698, Etro, Zappos Couture)
PUTRID in every way!


AWESOME:
($245, Juicy Couture, Plazatoo.com)
These are very sweet in a holiday-spirit, trimming-the-tree sorta way (even though I'm Jewish, so they're sweet in what I'd image in a trimming-the-tree sorta way.) I also love that these are nearly the exact same shoe but for way way less:
($23, Classified, Lulusfashionlounge.com)
Hooray 4 knockoffs!



AWFUL:
($250, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Plazatoo.com)
Hurl.


AWESOME:
($20, Target)
Very cute, no creepy Bedazzled embellishments.


SUPER AWFUL:

($67, Era Of Chaos, LF Stores)
Seriously... what the FUCK is going on here? Not only do these look like an imitation of those Imitation of Christ jeans they sewed Scarlett Johansson into at their runway show back in ought-5, but they look so uncomfortable that if you sat in them at work all day, you'd have potentially sterlized yourself by COB.


AWESOME:
($89, Banana Republic)
Even I am mortified that I'm into something from Banana Republic, but these are really really cute. Via Stylebakery's Fall Jeans Guide.



AWFUL:
($102, LF Stores)
Um, did we learn NOTHING from Jennifer Hudson's Oscar-on-Oscar shrug fiasco???



AWESOME:
($274, Mint, Pinkmascara.com)
Yes, you actually CAN wear metallics without looking like a member of Daft Punk.



AWFUL:
($48, What Comes Around Goes Around, Activeendeavors.com)
Duuuude. Dude. Duuuuuuude. This reminds me of what the grandparents sleep in in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." Worst.


AWESOME:
($62, Soundgirl, Fredflare.com)
Yes, you can wear a striped dress without looking like you're wearing a mumu. I, for one, will be wearing this dress shortly, as I just bought it! Weee!

Say goodbye, Jennifer!