Cute Shirt Alert: 7 For All Mankind/ Mika Ninagawa Photo-Print Flower Tee

($89, 7ForAllMankind.com)

While I'M SUPER particular about floral prints -- forecast: sometimes cute, with a high chance of OD'ing on '90s grunge-girl nostalgia -- I freaking LOVE a photo print. Especially 7 For All Mankind's small collection of Japanese photographer Mika Ninagawa's floral photos. I LOVE the bold fuschias and quick flashes of blue.

It's a LITTLE tricky to style without veering into Totally Cheesy Territory (avoid the overly obvious black pants/ black blazer combo because then the shirt's just way too loud) but I'm thinking these light-rinse Gap jeans:

($69.50, Gap)

... And (stay with me here) some nice neutral sculptural shoes like:

($210, Pour La Victoire, Zappos.com)

I can't personally do wedges, but I LOVE these Pour La Victorie grey cut-out wedges.

Anyway, love the floral photo-print lily tee. It's basically the Bjork Post album cover of shirts.

Santa, Please Put These Carin Wester Klea Sherpa Ankle Boots In My Stocking

($429, Carin Wester, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Granted, Santa, I know I don't "celebrate Christmas" or "believe in you," but perhaps if you could please somehow fit these perfect, putty-colored Carin Wester wedges into the stocking I do not own, I could make a gracious exception. How does that sound? Also, seeing as how they're $429, I will completely understand if this is my only stocking stuffer. I think that's more than fair.

Solestruck Is Having A Big Shoe Sale. HUGE.

Guise! Solestruck is having a MASSIVE shoe sale. Get 50% off of any sale shoes with promo code FP72HMPZF. Through Monday!

($279, Maurie & Eve, Solestruck.com)

Sadly these Maurie & Eve leopard wedges weren't on sale, but I did get these Rocket Dog Otto heels in white leather. Because you can never have enough of those!

($191, Matt Bernson, Solestruck.com)

I paused briefly to consider these Matt Bernson Ripcord wedges because they're like $80, but I took a pass since I'm terrified of high wedges.

($19.95, Rocket Dog, Solestruck.com)

These were like $9. I mean, come on. Anyway, Solestruck also has free shipping for return customers, and you can opt to ship your shoes in an earth-friendly box. Now go forth and consume!

Prada's Cavallino Bowler Is Doing Wild Things To My Head

I don't know who I think I am, but apparently I'm the kind of person who somehow, suddenly looks at Prada bags. Generally I write off Prada bags a.) because I can't afford them, DUHR, and b.) because I associate them with those terrible nylon black backpacks which are just the worst. But somehow I'm all into the idea of Prada's leopard-print Cavallino bowler.

($3,100, Prada, NeimanMarcus.com)

Great, right? Too bad I enjoy "eating," and "having an apartment" and "not being wildly in debt."

Anyway, my obnoxious Prada leopard-print bag fantasies inspired a major animal-print binge, which netted the following:

($585, Hammitt, Searlenyc.com)

Studs with animal print can be a leeeettle cowboy, but this bag by LA brand Hammitt still kinda works.

($745, Stella McCartney, Net-a-porter.com)

The elusive zebra-colored leopard print! Score!

($564, Opening Ceremony, Asos.com)

Opening Ceremony! Why are you so good to us? (And also, why are you so expensive?)

($158, Sam Edelman, Nordstrom)

Sam Edelman's Katrice wedge FTW! So '70s it's sick!

($80, Topshop)

I love an adventurous outfit, but have these leopard-print harem pants crossed the line from adventurous to crazy? Like Real Housewives table-flipping levels of nuts? Also, as much as I wanna make harem pants "work," I'm becoming increasingly convinced that they barely even look good on models whose body types are "pencil."

($36, Walmart)

Finally, this IS FashionBinge, where we do love a good deal, so far it be from me to leave you without something affordable. I mean, this Walmart leopard-print bag isn't the absolute worst. I'd carry it to the gym. Seriously, just tell people it's vintage deadstock, and they'll be all "ooh!"

I'M BACK, BITCHES!

As Mac says, WHAT'S UP, BITCHES? I'm back! My apologies for the lag, which I'm sure was soul-crushing, but I was off getting MARRIED!!!! Meanwhile, Catherine was VERY BUSY carrying my train (jk -- I didn't have a train -- SO FUSSY!). Anyway, let's get the BAWL ROLLIN' again, shall we?

($135, 80%20, Moxsie.com)

I am VERY MUCH INTO these leather/ cork/ peeptoe/ perforated/ tassled wedges. It's SO many ingredients in ONE shoe. It's like a shoe casserole.

I'm Breaking My No Wedges Rule For These Alexandre Birmans

($795, Alexandre Birman, Neimanmarcus.com)

Usually I live life in the wedge-free zone, not because I'm not into wedges but only because I can't walk in them. However, I'd gladly break my wedge ban for these gorgeous Alexandre Birman (the Brazilian shoe designer who CAN'T NOT make sexy/exotic safari-from-the-comfort-of-an-SUV heels) python wedges. They're so gorgeous --- delicate-looking yet tough -- and so visceral that they almost look alive. Bluefly has a few pairs of Alexandre Birman, but it's Just. Not. The Same.

Such Great Heights: Gap Design Editions by Pierre Hardy Neutral Floral Bow Wedges

Were I to even attempt to walk in these neutral wedges -- they're part of Gap Design Editions by Pierre Hardy's collection -- I think I'd tumble. I think I'd lay down and almost die. That is a FIVE AND A HALF INCH WEDGE we're talking about. But if you have enough ankle control, coordination and luck, have at it. I never get sick of that sophisticated putty color.

($110, Gap)

Jeffrey Campbell, Who Let This Happen?

Look, I enjoy a gladiator wedge as much as the next girl, but I've got my limits. Unlike Jeffrey Campbell, who clearly has none. Khaki cloth? Cheeze-say 1990s silver cowboy buckles? There are just no words.

($210, Jeffrey Campbell, Stylebop.com)

SUPER Cute Blue Wedges At ModCloth!

($99, 80%20, Modcloth.com)

No reason. Just super cute 80%20 cork wedges the color of rain from my favey faves, Modcloth. Also, have you NOTICED how effin' cute their website is lately? I don't even work for them, I have no vested interest in them. Just pointing out/ applauding cuteness as I see it!

Lust Life: Loeffler Randall Studded Wedges

($200, Loeffler Randall, Footcandyshoes.com)

Sigh. It's probably for the best that these baby blue Loeffer Randall studded wedges are sold out in my all-too-common size.

That said, I'm still gonna go ahead and dedicate "Catch Me I'm Falling" -- one of my FAVORITE Freestyle R&B songs -- to them:

Natural Comfort For You, Everything Else For Me

Have y'all been into Natural Comfort shoes? They're definitely not for me, but if I had to wear wedges, these might be the only ones I'd go for. The brand was popular in the 1970s, but it's been recently resurrected, for people like Kate Hudson.


($99, Natural Comfort, Shoes.com)
Cute enough.



($99, Natural Comfort, Nordstrom)
Sorta cute...



($100, Natural Comfort, Zappos)
Cuter in teal.



($113, Natural Comfort, Zappos)
Also sorta okay.



($79, Natural Comfort, CutesyShoes.com)
Cute enough, in that Chrissy from Three's Company sorta way.



($97, Natural Comfort, Shoes.com)
Probably the only Natural Comforts I'd wear, of all these, despite the fact that this pair probably qualifies as regulation shuffleboard footwear.


Okay. Now onto "Everything Else For Me"

(Apprx $214 USD, Beatrix Ong, Koodos.com)
Beatrix Ong is the new black.



($49, Seychelles, Nordstrom)
Adorbs! The PERFECT heel height, width and shape. Not too boxy, not too stiletto-y.



($63, Poetic License, Amazon)
ExTREMEly tempting.



(Apprx $143, Fluxa, Barringtonbridges.co.uk)
Gorgeous.



($49, Restricted, Zappos)
For some reason, I'm almost into these.



($32, Bernardo, Modcloth.com)
I'm almost into these too.



($16, Classified, Amazon)
Also sorta cute.



($67, Poetic License, Amazon)
Fun cold weather shoes. And that can't come fast enough, as far as I'm concerned.



($59, Modcloth.com)
Absolutely adorable. This one seems like it'd even flatter curvy boh-days. And, it looks like it'd go well with...



($120, Seven For All Mankind, ShopRapunzels.com)
... These! Which I may buy. I've gone through several pairs, one of which stretched out to massive too-bigness, another which didn't and now no longer fits - wah. Or rather, I outgrew them. Oh wait... I don't care. Are 7s even in anymore?



($60, Becky Oh!, Beckyoh.com)
Extremely adorbs, via Indiefixx's Summer Shopping & Gift Guide.


K, bye!

Wicker Is For Patio Furniture...

... Not your feet, okay? Same goes for rattan, jute, straw and raffia. Actually, ESPECIALLY for raffia. That shit is itchy and scratchy, and really, like cockroaches, do either really serve ANY purpose except to be annoying? Yet still, Stella (Ms. McCartney if yer nasty) insists upon basketweaving them into footwear, and the well-heeled set (or those who consider themselves so) drink it up with a straw.

Really? These??



($575, Stella McCartney, Barneys)
Hideous, unflattering, and may God help you should you go within 40 feet of a fired-up grill. And is there anything worse than witnessing a girl (usually overly fake tanned by about six or seven shades) in a dangerously short babydoll dress hobbling over a subway grate in 6-inch-high wicker walkers, desperately trying to maintain balance while avoiding a "Seven-Year Itch" moment? Seriously, one of the worst of all summer fashion cliches.



($575, Stella McCartney, Bergdorf Goodman)
Nope. Still terrible!



($495, VPL)
Is this someone's idea of a cruel joke?



($640, Fendi, Barneys)
They're not wicker or whatever, but close enough, as they ARE hateful. Glakdfjl;asdjfsl;aj!



($34, Connie, Shoes.com)
Avert your eyes!



($520, Fendi, Barneys)
Fendi's high-heel version of a five-car-pileup. It's as though the ankle strap is the freaking jaws of life, desperately attempting to free the helpless victim (in this case, your foot) from its captor (in this case, this God awful excuse for a shoe).



($615, Manolo Blahnik, Bergdorf Goodman)
What's that old adage about money not buying taste?



(Apprx $35 USD, Dorothy Perkins)
If you absolutely MUST, these aren't bad, though I'm rarely a huge fan of the T-bar.



($29, SM New York, Shop.com)
Finally, a pair of raffia shoes that don't make me want to gouge my eyes out. BTW, loks like SM New York is Steve Madden's lower-rent label. I always thought Steve Madden shoes were unreasonably priced, so yay for this.



($521, Hollywould, Ilovehollywould.com)
Apparently what we have here is one of the season's "it bags," though that's not saying much considering another "it bag" is an obnoxious send-off of a bag poor people keep their earthly belongs in. Anyway, what's so special about this clutch? Sure it's cute, especially if you're going to the Kentucky Derby, (which is SOOOOOOO two weeks ago), but you can find a straw clutch in any half-way decent vintage shop. And I'll hazard a guess that they're well below $500 bucks and that the above clutch ain't worth 5 Benjamins.



($225, Isabella Fiore, Bergdorf Goodman)
If you're still jonesing for an expensive straw clutch, this is pretty cute and half the price of Hollywould's. I like the white version too.



($108, Franchi, Zappos.com)
Much better.



($68, Mad Imports)
Juicy and delish colors, and no hideous ornamentation!!! THANK you!

I'm also feeling some of their other "all-natural" products that don't make me want to toss my recycling in the trash in protest of aesthetic bastardization:


($110, Mad Imports)



($98, Mad Imports)

K, bye!